FOR RICHER OR POORER

As I’ve been thinking through the topic of money—it’s uses, stewardship issues and inherent responsibilities—it’s become clear that my thoughts on finances are likely very different from many other individuals’.  That’s not so much of a problem between me and most people because neither side has a say over how the other utilizes their resources.  But what if the person, whose views vary greatly from mine, is my spouse? 

Reading that, some of you married folks are likely wincing.  You know exactly what I’m talking about.  In our pre-marriage counseling, someone wisely pointed out to my husband and I that money is one of the three biggest reasons for conflict within a marriage.  I have read elsewhere that two thirds of divorces cite money problems as a root cause.  Unfortunately, most couples don’t stop to consider how and why the topic of money can be so divisive, and their marriages reflect the consequences of that oversight.  The answer is fairly simple, while the solution can take a lot of work. 

As children, we were all trained to hold certain perspectives and values in regard to money.  Our parents may have explicitly helped us learn money management.  They may have counseled us, given us money to manage, helped us find a job, and taught us how to budget and make wise decisions.  More than likely, however, our parents did none of these.  But still they trained us.  We grew up observing their spending and saving habits.  Regardless of what they told us, we quickly surmised their true core values by watching how they handled their finances and, more than likely, those caught values became our own.  As diverse as upbringings between spouses usually is, it’s no wonder that finances can cause so much friction.

On top of that, you’ve heard it said that opposites attract.  Individual partners in many of the couples I know are almost polar opposites.  Personality plays a key part in all aspects of life including a significant role in the way money is handled.  There are spontaneous spenders and careful savers.  You can just imagine (or have experienced) the tension a couple faces over a significant financial decision as they approach it from very different perspectives.

My husband and I are a great example of these differences in upbringing and personality.  My parents did an excellent job of teaching each of their children how to properly handle finances.  I was raised to save money, to appreciate the limited amount my family enjoyed, and to see it as a resource to do God’s work.  I am by nature a saver.  I save many things, not just money.  My husband, on the other hand, was not taught to be financially savvy.  He was raised to see money as a means to achieve comfort and acquire temporary happiness.  His resources growing up were fairly unlimited and delaying instant gratification was not a caught value.  Saving was not a priority he was taught, nor is it one he naturally has.  As you might guess, our views on money clashed mightily.  It became clear right from the beginning that money could either become a tool God used to draw us closer together or a wedge that would drive us apart.  The choice became ours. 

The issue of money between spouses can become a powerful unifying instrument, a means of deep personal character growth and change, as well as a way to deeper understanding and acceptance.  It can also become a tool to punish, a means to control, and a hill to die on.  Trust and togetherness can be won and lost on this crucial issue.  It would be fantastic if we could all enter marriage with the proper financial training, having made wise choices and utilizing open communication on this sensitive topic, but that is just not the case.

As my husband and I wrestled through this issue, it became clear that we both had a ways to go in our understanding of God’s financial plan for us.  Both of us had erroneous views on money and it’s uses.  Both of us had to learn to trust and rely on each other to bring our financial decisions into balance.  Both of us had to learn to keep the lines of communication open and resolve our monetary issues together under God’s direction.  After seven plus years, I have to say that the hard work is paying off.  We still disagree and still challenge each other in this area, but God has brought both of us into a closer alignment with His views, so those times when we clash have become fewer and far less volatile.  He has also been able to use us, as a unified couple, to accomplish some significant financial projects for His kingdom.

It’s clear due to the state of the world we live in, it’s uncertainty, drive for personal pleasure and focus on self-sufficiency, that money will always be a topic of discussion and potential division within marriage.  Becoming, and staying aware, of the possible pitfall it presents to your marital unity can save a lot of grief.  Whether you are just starting out on the marriage journey or have traveled quite a distance, taking the time to build a firm unified foundation on this topic will pay untold dividends.

Below are some significant tools to help build a firm financial foundation as a married couple.

• COMMUNICATION – Be willing to keep the door to unifying communication open with your spouse on the topic of money.  Many couples have virtually no ongoing financial communication other than argument.

•  CONTINUED PRAYER – Ask for God’s wisdom and help to bring you to consensus.  He has given us whatever resources we have and He desires to see us unified and useful for His service more than we do. “19 “I also tell you this: If two of you agree here on earth concerning anything you ask, my Father in heaven will do it for you. 20 For where two or three gather together as my followers, I am there among them.” (Matthew 18:19-20) NLT

• COUNSELING – Be open and willing to go as individuals and couples for both relational and financial concerns.  My husband and I have utilized this resource several times and greatly benefited from the experience of wise financial counselors as well as those who helped us work on our communication and underlying assumptions and values regarding money. "Without consultation, plans are frustrated, but with many counselors they succeed." (Proverbs 15:22) NASB

• CREATE GOALS TOGETHER – If spouses don’t know where they want to go financially or have differing destinations, confusion and tension are inevitable.  Generating a realistic, measurable budget and long term goals will help keep both sides on track when decisions need to be made.  “For which one of you, when he wants to build a tower, does not first sit down and calculate the cost to see if he has enough to complete it?” (Luke 14:28) NASB

NEXT TIME: Grocery Budgeting, my 12 week grocery budgeting challenge findings.

30% OFF DIAPERS – SERIOUSLY!

Diapering products are one of the biggest expenses for any household with young children.  If you happen to have two or more children in diapers, the bottom line can make you wince.  Of course, if you are so inclined you can go the cloth diaper route to reduce cost.  However, for a busy and on the move family like ours, disposables are the order of the day and obtaining them as cheaply as possible is high on my priority list.

To reduce cost, I first tried changing from the pricier Pampers brand we were using to cheaper store brands.  After testing a few different kinds, I quickly discovered that while the cheaper brands worked sufficiently for newborns, they just didn’t hold in those noxious messes for wiggly crawlers and toddlers.  Next, I tried the coupon game.  I faithfully looked for sales and combined coupons, often scoring several dollars off per box.  To that point I had avoided ordering online because any savings I found were nullified by the shipping costs.

Then a friend introduced me to Amazon.com for diaper savings.  Amazon advertizes 30% off on diapers with FREE shipping.  I was skeptical.  Saving that much AND not having to lug those boxes around anymore sounded too good to be true.  I figured there had to be some catch and tried it out with caution.  After buying diapers from Amazon for some time now, I have found a couple of tricks to maximize the savings, but I surprisingly haven’t found any hidden fees.  The savings in both money and hassle have been remarkable.

Imparting this secret to new moms and dads should be part of every delivery room procedure.  By using Amazon Mom to buy our diapering products we save about $300 per year.  (In comparing prices I have found that buying diapers this way brings the cost down to what store brands charge.  So, even if you are currently using store brands to save, you may want to consider upping the quality of your diapers and having them delivered to your home for the same price as going to the store and buying cheaper quality.)

Use the following link to find the Amazon Mom webpage to sign up.

www.amazon.com/mom

A FEW HELPFUL TIPS

• Subscribe and Save means you are signing up to receive repeated shipments of an item.  However, you are free to inactivate your subscription the moment you receive your purchase.  I do this each time I receive an item and reactivate when I need another.  I’ve noticed that between shipments the item’s price may change.  I do not want to be automatically charged the new price, which could be higher than the old one.
  
  
  I have found that I can reactivate an old Subscribe and Save order, at the old price, which can often be cheaper than any current Subscribe and Save offer.  (By doing this, the last time I ordered, I saved almost $5 on the box of diapers I purchased.)  I recommend comparing each time between what is currently offered and any inactive Subscribe and Save subscriptions you may have to get the best deal.  Also, compare prices between box sizes.  Sometimes, buying a smaller box of diapers will net you a lower price per diaper.  

• When signing up for Subscribe and Save on an item make sure to scroll down slightly on that item’s page.  Sometimes there are digital coupons you can clip to save even more on your order.  Several times I’ve scored an extra $1.50 off my box of diapers with an extra click.
  
  

• By purchasing diapers through Amazon you can also earn FREE shipping (Amazon Prime) on all other eligible Amazon.com purchases for a year.  It’s worth it to read the FAQ on how to do this as it can save you quite a bit of money on other items you may wish to purchase.

COMING UP SOON: Tips and ideas to lower your grocery bill.  I am currently completing a 12 week challenge on extreme grocery budgeting.  In upcoming blogs I’ll share my findings.

GODLINESS WITH CONTENTMENT = GREAT GAIN

I last posted on the topic of anxiety, something I struggle with in regards to our finances.  Over the last weeks as I’ve been thinking more about this, I’ve come to realize that an absence of worry is a good thing, but to be truly content with what you have is far better.  This is a state of mind we all crave, but one that we rarely enjoy.

Western culture is set up to be about as opposed to the experience of true contentment as you can get.  Our whole marketing industry is predicated on making you believe that what you have is inadequate -- that your life will be less than complete if you miss out on owning whatever is being touted at that moment as the answer to your discontent.  These messages bombard us from every possible quarter and it’s almost impossible to remain cognizant of their influence and to filter them out.

When we pay attention to our thoughts, we find ourselves comparing our lives to those of others, resulting in envy and dissatisfaction.  We find that we are traveling though life subconsciously searching for that one elusive thing we hope will bring us contentment while often unaware or forgetting that contentment is not about what we have, but about who we already are in Jesus, if we have entered into a personal relationship with Him.

So how do we find contentment with our financial situations whatever they may be?  The apostle Paul, who enjoyed success in every arena of life, gave it all up to serve the cause of Christ.  He was diametrically opposed to his/our culture’s materialistic pursuit of contentment.  Here is what he says in his letters to the Philippians and Timothy.  The same sentiment is echoed in Hebrews.  While studying these, some key thoughts hit me concerning pursuit of true, lasting contentment.

Philippians 4:11 Not that I was ever in need, for I have learned how to be content with whatever I have. 12 I know how to live on almost nothing or with everything. I have learned the secret of living in every situation, whether it is with a full stomach or empty, with plenty or little. 13 For I can do everything through Christ, who gives me strength. (NLT)

As I look to Jesus to give strength and joy for life, my focus shifts from having material wealth as a source of fulfillment and onto Him.  As I center more of my attention on Him, the distracting, anti-contentment messages around me begin to fade and I crave more of Him and less of the counterfeits.  Paul says that he “learned to be content”.  As humans we are naturally discontented.  We choose to learn contentment through a process of getting our focus reoriented onto Jesus.

1 Timothy 6:6 But godliness with contentment is great gain. 7 For we brought nothing into the world, and we can take nothing out of it. 8 But if we have food and clothing, we will be content with that.  9 Those who want to get rich fall into temptation and a trap and into many foolish and harmful desires that plunge people into ruin and destruction. 10 For the love of money is a root of all kinds of evil. Some people, eager for money, have wandered from the faith and pierced themselves with many griefs. (NIV)

Having an eternal perspective helps us to stay content.  Realizing and remaining conscious that our stuff won’t travel with us to the next life sharpens our focus on what is truly important in this one.  We start to see our wealth as a tool to be used here, rather than something to collect and hoard.

Hebrew 13:5 Don’t love money; be satisfied with what you have. For God has said,

   “I will never fail you.  I will never abandon you.” (NLT)

As we grow in our understanding of God’s unending love for us, we’ll start to relax our controlling desire to make sure all contingencies in life are planned for.  We’ll stop basing our security and future happiness on the things we own and we’ll start to rest in the love of our perfect Father who has promised to remain faithful in all of life’s ups and downs.

NOTE: I recently watched a secular movie called The Joneses that offered a surprisingly pointed critique of our cultural obsession with comparing our wealth to our neighbors’.  While I don’t agree with everything in the movie, it was provocative in challenging materialistic trends.

MOP TOP CHOP

Cutting hair.  Who knew I could?  I’d never done it before, but looking at how much our family spends on haircuts each year I thought it might be worth a try.  Surprisingly, with some patience and my family’s feedback I’ve gotten pretty good at it.  I’m no stylist, but two of us have very simple cuts to maintain.  After learning the basics by paying attention to stylists, checking out YouTube videos, and lots of practice, practice, practice, I’m able to reliably reproduce great results.  It’s a time commitment and it’s not always fun to keep a child in place for the length of time it takes to do, but by cutting hair at home we will save about $290 dollars a year.  I calculated that for the time I spend cutting I am making/saving about $25 per hour.  This certainly makes it a worthwhile venture.

As you start out on your haircutting adventure it’s important to know a few things.  First, buy quality scissors, trimmers, thinning shears, etc.  You don’t have to purchase top of the line, but if you buy too cheaply the equipment will pull/hack at the hair rather than giving a clean cut.  For the sake of the finished product as well as your subject’s comfort, spending a little more up front is worth it. 

Secondly, it can take some time and practice to become proficient.  It can be hard to take critiques from family members, but you will improve and they will be increasingly happy with the results.  After all, stylists go to school and sit under countless hours of instruction to learn how to cut hair.  Be willing to laugh at your mistakes and keep in mind that it’s not a failure if your guinea pig has to visit a professional to fix a goof up.  It’s just a part of the learning process.  

That being said, the third thing you need to know is when to leave it alone.  Some haircuts will always be beyond my capabilities.  I don’t plan on attending beauty school and I just don’t have a natural haircutting knack.  Don’t feel badly if one or two people in your family still have to visit a salon or barber. 

Mostly view it as a fun experience to share with your family.  Remember, neither one of you is going anywhere for the duration, so chat it up.  It’s amazing what topics you can cover as you share some undivided time. 

If you have little ones and have the patience to try and cut their hair, it can be fun to include a sibling in distracting them while you cut.  With young children it may actually take two or three sittings to get it right.  When either of you run out of patience just put the scissors away and try again later when there’s a fresh distraction. 

SAVINGS TIP:  In Mary Hunt’s book, Live Your Life for Half the Price, she has a section on shampoo.  Here’s what she says. 

“All shampoos regardless of brand are 80 to 90 percent water.  The rest is detergent with a pathetically few drops of fragrance and other additives and preservatives.  There are basically two kids of detergent: Anionic (harsh) and cationic (gentle).  … Water (or some fancy name for good old H2O) will always be the first ingredient.  Next comes the detergent.  Examples you can expect to find:

Ammonium Lauryl Sulfate – very harsh

Ammonium Laureth Sulfate – harsh

Sodium Lauryl Sulfate (SLS) – still harsh

Sodium Laureth Sulfate (SLES) – mild, great choice

TEA (or MEA) Lauryl Sulfate – gentle, good choice

TEA (or MEA) Laureth Sulfate – gentle, good choice

Shampoos often contain antistatic and detangling agents and also thickeners, humectants (moisturizers) and conditioners.  But these items are in such small quantities it’s almost a joke.  Besides, the detergent washes all of it down the drain when you rinse” (279-280).

She goes on to say that using coupons and watching for sales you can get away with buying mild/gentle shampoo for a dollar or less a bottle.  A couple examples of shampoos that have gentle detergents are Herbal Essence and Garnier Fructis.

NOTE: Unlike shampoo, the quality of your conditioner does make a difference because unlike the shampoo some of it does remain in your hair.

DON'T WORRY, BE HAPPY THANKFUL

Last Friday, a storm caused a huge tree limb to fall in our backyard knocking down power lines, which in turn took out our house power box and part of our back porch.  Anyone who has had something like this happen knows what comes next, the endless calls to repair folks, insurance companies and the city trying to get the problem resolved.  And let’s not forget the worst part—that sinking feeling that comes with calculating the out-of-pocket cost.

I’d like to say that I was calm and handled the crisis well.  I’d like to say that I trusted God’s provision for our family and was able to accept that He allowed this to happen.  I’d like to say that my worry over finances didn’t affect how I treated my family.  But that would be such a lie. 

It’s fun to creatively save and see how we can better handle money.  It’s fun to put that money away for a rainy day or other projects and watch it grow.  But when that rainy day comes and we actually have to spend what we’ve put aside, my blood pressure takes a serious hike.  I’m a chronic worrier and money is a favorite topic of mine to mull over.  When something like a huge tree branch careens into my world, I find my low-level, ongoing anxiety over whether we will have enough for this or that takes on a whole new dimension and suddenly I’m experiencing anxiety overload.

The incident brought my sin of worry over money into sharp focus.  As I reflected on my responses, I was struck by something Jesus says in Matthew 6.  He says,

 ²⁵ “That is why I tell you not to worry about everyday life—whether you have enough food and drink, or enough clothes to wear. Isn’t life more than food, and your body more than clothing? ²⁶ Look at the birds. They don’t plant or harvest or store food in barns, for your heavenly Father feeds them. And aren’t you far more valuable to him than they are? ²⁷Can all your worries add a single moment to your life?

 ²⁸ “And why worry about your clothing? Look at the lilies of the field and how they grow. They don’t work or make their clothing, ²⁹ yet Solomon in all his glory was not dressed as beautifully as they are. ³⁰ And if God cares so wonderfully for wildflowers that are here today and thrown into the fire tomorrow, he will certainly care for you. Why do you have so little faith?

 ³¹ “So don’t worry about these things, saying, ‘What will we eat? What will we drink? What will we wear?’ ³² These things dominate the thoughts of unbelievers, but your heavenly Father already knows all your needs. ³³ Seek the Kingdom of God above all else, and live righteously, and he will give you everything you need.

 ³⁴ “So don’t worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will bring its own worries. Today’s trouble is enough for today.

In our uncertain economy it’s easy to focus a large portion of our thoughts on providing for ourselves and our families.  Even if we have enough for today, it’s easy to wonder if we will have enough for tomorrow.  Jesus, however, calls attention to the fact that, “These things dominate the thoughts of unbelievers.”  Worry over money is something that characterizes the thought life of a person who doesn’t know Jesus.  It places trust in our own ability to provide for ourselves rather than in our Heavenly Father who already knows “all [our] needs” and has the resources to meet them.  Further, a steward is someone who takes care of someone else’s possessions.  When I worry, am I acting the part of the steward or am I taking ownership of God’s resources?  A true steward doesn’t have to sweat over what happens to the things they care for, because they aren’t his/hers. 

The only real antidote for a worry filled life is found in Philippians chapter 4. 

6 Don’t worry about anything; instead, pray about everything. Tell God what you need, and thank him for all he has done. 7 Then you will experience God’s peace, which exceeds anything we can understand. His peace will guard your hearts and minds as you live in Christ Jesus.

When you find yourself considering some aspect of your finances this week, make an effort to not just think about it, but to pray about it as well, no matter how trivial.  After all, we are admonished by Paul to pray about everything.  As we tell God what we need, we are also called to thank Him for all His many blessings.  As we practice giving our anxieties to the Lord, we are promised a peace that surpasses anything we can possibly imagine, a peace that will guard both our emotions and our thoughts.  This is a peace no stash of money, no matter how large, can ever provide and no tree branch, no matter how large, can ever destroy.

TO SEE OR NOT TO SEE

Contact lenses.  If you wear them, you know that sinking feeling when you reach for your last pair.  It’s time to reorder and drop more than a little change doing so.  Usually, before reordering you have to have a checkup to obtain an updated prescription.  While there, most optometrists will walk you through the process of ordering lenses.  They won’t tell you, however, that you will be paying additional fees for ordering through their practice. 

There is a much more cost effective way to go about obtaining your lenses although it will require a small amount of legwork on your part.  I saved $81.80 for about an hour’s worth of work.  This adds up significantly if you have more than one person in your house wearing lenses.

Here’s how.  First, call your insurance company to find out what you qualify for and what they require to reimburse you for buying the contacts.  (Make sure you understand any drop in coverage if you choose to go out of network to get your lenses.  Online companies are considered out of network, and likely your coverage will diminish somewhat, so you need to decide if it’s worth doing.)  Next, when you visit your optometrist ask for a copy of your prescription once your visit is complete.  Then shop around online for a good deal on your particular contact lenses.  Lastly, after you purchase/receive them, send in the appropriate paperwork to your insurance company.

Here is what I did.  I ordered my contacts from lens.com (great service, prices, and easy to use).  By doing so, I saved $13.35 on each of 8 boxes for a total of $106.80 over what my optometrist would have charged me.  I did lose $25 on my insurance benefit by choosing to go out of network for the contacts, but it was obviously still worth it with a final savings of $81.80.  It took me about an hour total to call my insurance company, find the best online deal and turn in the appropriate paperwork. 

SAVINGS TIP:  The brand ACUVUE typically offers rebates on their lenses.  By sending in the box tops and filling out their form I was able to receive a $25 rebate.  It’s worth it to see if your lenses qualify.  Asking for information at the optometrist’s office on rebates may not net you anything worthwhile once they realize you won’t be purchasing your contacts through them.  So check around online and you may find a rebate that way.

LET'S TALK $$$

“…You can’t fake stewardship.  Your checkbook reveals all that you really believe about stewardship.  A life story could be written from a checkbook.  It reflects your goals, priorities, convictions, relationships, and even the use of your time.  A person who has been a Christian for even a short while can fake prayer, Bible study, evangelism, going to church, and so on, but he can’t fake what his checkbook reveals.  Maybe that is why so many of us are so secretive about our personal finances.”  (Ron Blue)

So true!  When the topic of cost comes up regarding something I demonstrated poor stewardship on, I cringe.  An objective number is hard to explain away.  It’s right there in black and white for anyone privy to the knowledge to judge.  As I thought more about this I also realized that sharing about positive financial steps, like what we give away or how we’ve used our money to help others, can be equally difficult for me.  How we spend money truly does reveal our goals/priorities/convictions.  If we are honest with others regarding our financial decisions we leave ourselves open to possible critique.  What’s even more difficult to swallow is that the critique may be well deserved.  So we hide behind the ‘don’t ask, don’t tell’ policy our culture has perfected on this vitally important topic. 

Let’s say that we never talk about another significant area of our lives—parenting.  We don’t communicate with other parents regarding our children.  We don’t ask each other for advice and tips on childrearing.  We refuse to share our experiences and wisdom with other parents who need it, even withholding this valuable information from our own children when they begin to parent.  We hide our mistakes and hurts and put up a façade that all is well, even when our families are crumbling from the inside out.  And we absolutely refuse to ask or answer any meaningful questions that might in any way make it seem as if we don’t have it all together. 

It’s quite obvious the devastation this attitude would generate.  Very soon each new parent would have to learn everything from scratch, the hard way.  From infant feeding and diaper rash to potty training and schooling and on to adolescence, each step would have to be blazed from a veritable wilderness of confusion.  Mistakes that could easily have been avoided would be numerous and likely far more painful than necessary. 

It’s no different with money.  Many of us find it difficult to be open about our financial situations.  We fear others’ judgment of us.  So we cut communication on this issue.  We stop asking for advice and sharing our experiences and struggles.  We hide our mistakes and needs and do everything to ensure others don’t have a negative impression of how we handle our finances.

But there is a heavy price to pay.  This secretive approach to money is likely hindering us from receiving help we may very badly need.  Maybe we have debt hanging over our heads we don’t know how to deal with, or a bad spending habit we haven’t been able to get under control on our own.  Maybe we have needs others would be happy to help meet if we only opened our mouths.  Or possibly, through our own poor training, we simply lack the basic tools to handle money well and desperately need another’s wisdom.  Ultimately we are cutting off a significant means of character growth when we refuse to talk about finances.  Money and learning to handle it well can be one of the biggest tools God uses to make us more like Jesus.

I am not advocating laying out your finances for all to see.  Obviously that approach is not wise either.  Rather, I am more and more convinced that as we are candid in this, as in other areas, with the trustworthy people God has placed in our lives, He will use our openness to change us and help others as well.  Ultimately we answer to the One who already owns all that we have, but as in other areas, His people have great input that He can use for our good.  Not to mention that openness breeds accountability for our actions and helps us maintain good stewardship values. 

Have you chosen to let someone else into this very private area of your life, or are you letting your fear of being judged short circuit God’s ability to transform your character and help you become the steward He desires for the resources that He’s given you?

Fools think their own way is right, but the wise listen to others.  Proverbs 12:15 NLT

Plans go wrong for lack of advice; many advisers bring success.  Proverbs 15:22 NLT

TALK IS CHEAP

Cell phones.  Funny how something that used to be such a luxury has evolved into a necessity.  Now that every family member owns one instead of all sharing a house phone, the costs have also increased exponentially.  It’s easy to research and sign up for what is initially the best plan, but then forget to periodically reevaluate.  As my family’s lifestyle has changed over the past few years, our phone needs have changed too.  At one time we had to keep checking to make sure we weren’t blowing past our allotted minutes and had a plan that accommodated our high usage.  Now, it seems we use a fraction of those minutes and have instead increased our texting.

It’s important to evaluate a service bill (phone/cable/Netflix/etc.) periodically.  Just by reviewing your service bills you may quickly find very significant savings like I did. 

QUESTIONS TO ASK YOURSELF:

v  Does the amount I use the service justify paying what I do for it?  Ex. We found that as our lives changed we no longer had time for many of the TV shows on cable.  We were paying for the privilege of having those shows available, but rarely watching them.

v  Do I have the right plan?  Ex. Our number of texts has increased drastically.  Paying for minutes, texts and data time we don’t actually use, or paying for the same on a per minute/text basis when we use significantly over our limit, can really eat a hole in our budget.  (It’s not a big deal to pay for a couple of extra text charges each month.  It’s actually more cost effective to just pay for the additional few on a per text basis if you only use a couple of extra ones.) 

v  Do I really need all the extras I’m paying for or would it be better stewardship to cut back?  I’m not saying that the extra features on a phone or the channels on cable or whatever else you have are bad per se.  They can be great tools and a lot of fun.  However, are they worth the money you are investing in them, or are they taking resources away from other things you would say are more of a priority in your life?  Ex. Some people may not be able to do this, we save on our phone bill by making a decision not to pay for access to the web from our phones.  With multiple computers available to each of us, this was an extra we felt we could do without.  Cutting data charges and sticking to a simple text and call plan can save quite a bit.

Reviewing and evaluating your service bills doesn’t have to be time consuming. The simple change we made to our phone bill took a phone call and a few minutes to implement, but over the course of a year will equal significant savings for us.  (If you save just $5 a month on one bill, over the course of a year you will save $60.)

SAVINGS TIP: Check out possible discounts on products and services offered by your providers.  Ex. We discovered a 15% discount on our phone service by Verizon Wireless for certain company and state employees.  It’s worth checking to see if your carrier has this and if you qualify.

(Verizon link – http://www.verizonwireless.com/b2c/employee/emaildomainauthentication.jsp)

NEXT TIME:  Are you as open with others regarding your finances as you are in other areas of your life, or is discussing money matters with others off limits for you?

WHOM DO YOU SERVE?

“No one can serve two masters. Either you will hate the one and love the other, or you will be devoted to the one and despise the other. You cannot serve both God and money.” Luke 16:13

At first glance, this verse doesn’t appear to present much of a problem.  If asked, I’d probably say “I’ve got this one covered.  I do serve God and I don’t serve money.”  Case closed.  Move onto the next verse.  This passage makes me think of Scrooge lovingly counting his piles of gold.   I’m not like that, am I?  For me, money is just an inanimate object.  It’s a tool, a resource to use in life.  I wouldn’t serve something like that, would I?

Then I am reminded of something Larry Burkett says in his book The Complete Financial Guide For Young Couples: “About 80 percent of our waking day is consumed in thinking about money: making it, saving it, spending it, or giving it away.  If this area isn’t managed properly, everything else is out of balance” (13).

His statement made me sit up and take notice.  I can’t say for certain if I spend 80% of my thought life on money.  But as I have started to pay attention to what flickers through my mind on a given day, to my shame I have to admit that I spend vastly more time on matters related to money than on spiritual considerations.  By this measure alone, the above verse seems to have decided implications for me. 

If that’s not convicting enough, let’s think about it some more.  Are we able to honestly answer the following questions without further placing ourselves into the hot seat on this issue?

v  In what do I place my sense of security for life?  How much of it is bound up with the savings I have or in my projected future earnings?

v  Is money truly a resource I use for God’s purposes, or is it first and foremost a resource I use to meet my own wants?  When it comes to money, am I truly generous or does God get my leftovers?

v  From what do I derive my sense of worth?  Do my possessions/bank accounts define me as a person?  If I am not financially well off, do I feel like a lesser person?

Questions like these can open our eyes to flawed core values we may hold.  Who occupies the first place in our lives?  Do we even realize the reality of our affections slowly leaching away from God to material matters?  Our culture is certainly no help.  It loudly and regularly promotes money as the essential ingredient to our personal well-being.  Those who have it are lauded as successful, while those without it are looked down upon and pitied.  Without intent to the contrary it’s easy to imbibe these cultural values as truth. 

Do we worship God or money?  The verse is clear.  We can’t have it both ways.  The answer to this question cannot fail to impact every area of our lives, because monetary concerns permeate our existence.  Money is not evil in itself.  It’s a necessity and can be used for great good.  But do we truly view it as a tool, or has it usurped God’s place and become our master as we place our security/worth/happiness upon it?

SUDS FOR DUDS

One area of our budget that needs a savings overhaul is household cleaning products.  Looking through past receipts I’ve noticed that I regularly spend quite a bit for items like toilet paper, soaps, paper towels, detergents, etc.  I can’t really cut down the use of these things without also sabotaging my ongoing battle to keep my house and family clean, but there must be some cheaper alternatives to what I’ve been using.  I’ve been looking into making my own cleaning products and kicked off my search with homemade laundry detergent.  This was a winner!  It results in annual savings of about $75! 

RECIPE

1 cup Borax

1 cup washing soda

1 bar soap (I used Ivory, but you can use other brands including laundry soaps like Fels-Naptha)

DIRECTIONS

Grate the bar of soap.  (I used a cheese grater.)

Mix all 3 ingredients together. 

Use 1 Tbsp/load (2 Tbsp/load if heavily soiled).  Let soap mix well with water before adding clothes. 

YIELD: 3 cups or 48 loads (1 Tbsp/load)

TIME/BATCH: Under 5 minutes

TIP: Use a funnel to put all the ingredients into a plastic juice bottle with a cap that measures 1 Tbsp.  Shake to mix.  Cap can be used to measure the amount for each load.

NOTE: I don’t have one, but have read that this can be used in HE washers because it has low suds.

Typically, I use one full capful of ALL brand liquid detergent per full laundry load.  I was skeptical that just 1 Tbsp of the homemade soap would work as well, but stuck to the recipe.  AMAZING!!  Load after load it seems to give the same level of results.  (If I had to soak or pre-scrub something with the old detergent, I still have to, but no more than before.)  The only difference I can tell is that it lacks that fresh laundry scent.  If that’s a must for you, I’ve read that you can add essential oils to your homemade mix. 

HOMEMADE COST: $0.028/load. 

When you compare cost, remember that the loads listed on brand name detergents assume you will use the minimum amount suggested per load (not extra for larger or more soiled loads).  I found I regularly used more than the minimum amount to keep ahead of my dirt loving children.  By using one full capful of ALL detergent instead of the suggested minimum, I essentially cut their load totals in half, which in turn means that the homemade saves me even more.  Using my mix I save about $0.20/load.  If, like me, you do a lot of laundry and add it up annually the savings are significant.  Definitely worth it for the time spent.

SAVINGS TIP: When saving small amounts here and there in your budget, it may at first not appear worth the effort.  Only when the savings are added up over a longer period of time (monthly, annually) can it really be determined if it’s worth the time invested.

(For example: 1 load/day at a savings of $0.20 = an annual savings of about $75.  It would only take about 38 minutes to make all the detergent necessary for the year.  $75 for a little over half an hour worth of work is a great return for the time invested.)

NEXT TIME:  How much time do you spend thinking about money on any given day: making it, saving it, spending it, giving it away, etc.?

A BETTER BUDGET

Most of us could use some extra cash.  Maybe we wish we had more to give away, or want to start a savings plan for those inevitable rainy days.  Maybe we have a project or vacation we’d like to fund or are sick to death of being in debt.  Unfortunately, aside from the unlikely events of winning the lottery or having an inheritance dropped on us, there’s really no way to obtain the extra cash unless we work for it.

I’ve spent quite a bit of time brainstorming ways I might contribute extra to our family income while still maintaining my current responsibilities.  Inevitably, I find that my ideas run into one almost insurmountable problem.  It seems next to impossible to find a bit of part-time work that pays well enough to make it worth the time and effort to do the job.

So what’s to be done?  Add the stress and time constraints to my already busy life for very little compensation, or is there another way to increase our family’s cash flow?  After hashing this out with others who have the same issue, I believe it’s time to approach the problem from a different angle.  I need to hire myself to save our family money that is ALREADY in our budget. 

What if I can save the same amount of money or much more, per hour worked as if I made it working a part-time job?  I can set my own hours, work in my own home, with all profits going directly into our family’s pockets.  Would it be worth it?  For me, absolutely!  I’ve recently noticed two things about my budget that point me in the direction of hiring myself to save us money.

1.  Our lifestyle tends to increase as our income increases.  Without really realizing it, there are areas of our budget (ex. our food bill) that have increased slowly without my conscious decision.  Sure the cost of food has gone up, but instead of determining if that’s the case or if I’m just buying more expensive/convenience items, I’ve just accepted the increased cost without assessing it’s source.  A cursory glance at our budget reveals several line items that fall in this category.

2.  There have been many life changes for us in the last several years.  Life changes can include things like marriage, a major purchase like a house or car, children, etc.  My budget doesn’t necessarily reflect those changes other than the ones I’ve made from necessity, like buying diapers or paying home insurance.  I’ve added expenses or just continued paying on old ones, many times without evaluating them to see if there are more cost effective ways of handling the additional outflow of cash.

Saving money for the purpose of using it for long-term financial goals is a great reason for me to embark on this savings venture.  However, for me there is a deeper and more important reason to become increasingly financially savvy.  The Bible says that, “The earth is the LORD’s, and everything in it, the world, and all who live in it; for he founded it on the seas and established it on the waters.” Psalm 24:1-2.

My family believes that everything we have belongs to God.  We believe He made us and put us in our particular corner of the world with all its attached wealth and privileges.  This being the case, we also believe we are accountable to Him for how we handle the money He’s provided.  In his book Master Your Money Ron Blue points out,

“…God has the right to whatever He wants whenever He wants it.  It is all His, because an owner has rights, and I, as a steward, have only responsibilities. …I literally possess much but own nothing. … You may have the title to (something), but that title reflects your right to possess it temporarily, not forever.” Pg 19-20

Over the course of this project I plan to both look into practical ways of reaching a better budget as well as studying and sharing Biblical principles on money.  Some of the changes I'll make will be small while some will have comparatively huge savings. Some will have objective dollar signs attached while others will involve mindset changes that will increase our family’s overall ability to become more fiscally responsible and to financially thrive in our current challenging economy. 

This blog will be my notes and observations on building a better budget for those of you who are interested.  I welcome and appreciate your input and further suggestions as I introduce each weekly topic.

Luke 16:10 “Whoever can be trusted with very little can also be trusted with much, and whoever is dishonest with very little will also be dishonest with much. 11 So if you have not been trustworthy in handling worldly wealth, who will trust you with true riches? 12 And if you have not been trustworthy with someone else’s property, who will give you property of your own?